They're luverly ! get 'em while they're 'ot !

Discussion in 'Culture' started by spartacus, Dec 9, 2004.

  1. spartacus

    spartacus Haliphron Atlanticus Registered

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    next in line for my Xmas extravaganza of gifts for discerning cephalopodan eccentrics is the:
    SUPER SUTURE SEARCHER

    If like Phil, you have trouble differentiating an Arnioceras from an Arnie Schwarzenegger try this new product (pat. pending).

    Loosely based on NASA's Swift probe :shock: (excuse the expression)
    gamma ray burst (GRB) detector's coded aperture mask, this new ammonite :ammonite: classification tool projects an image of the specimen's suture line (ref. Fossils & History dept. if you're still clueless) onto the coded aperture mask & when the sophisticated software detects a match from it's considerable data base of ammonite :ammonite: species the resulting match is displayed on screen & out pops a sticky label also heralding the same info. from your printer. Clever eh ? :sly:

    Although this product is still in fledging, prototype form, I'm happy & willing to accept advance orders (Paypal, cheque, cash, Greenshield stamps all readily accepted) whilst I await the necessary sophisticated software, considerable data base, hardware & expertise to materialize (yes that is a "Z" & it's correct) :P

    happy ordering & thanks for looking :D
     
  2. um...

    um... Architeuthis Supporter

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    Will this thing fit under a standard Christmas tree?
     
  3. spartacus

    spartacus Haliphron Atlanticus Registered

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    of course it will young Um..., but if it doesn't just trim off the bottom standard branches & hey presto, it's slotundertastic ! :D
     
  4. Phil

    Phil Colossal Squid Supporter Registered

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    Apologies for the tardy. I've been grappling with my gastrics for a few days; a pathetic excuse and utterly remiss of me!

    Very good idea the Super Suture Searcher. This invention of yours would also save time in fossil shops as each suture pattern, being of course unique to the species, could act as a barcode. Each ammonoid passed over the IR checkout reader connected to your SSS reader would automatically price each fossil, much as one does with a tin of beans down at the local Liptons.

    This would so speed up the queues that normally develop in these shops, and help quieten the kids who just want to rush home to their PlayTowers. The five items only queue would be a godsend!

    And cumulative points could be collected for a super fossil to be given at Christmas to a befuddled relative in exchange for a kipper tie.
     
  5. spartacus

    spartacus Haliphron Atlanticus Registered

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    Jeez Phil, never thought of that :shock: great selling point :thumbsup:
    I always knew you were a smart cookie but blimey. Grease my palms with a smidge of venture capital & I'll cut you in on a phat percentage !
     

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