Mesonychoteuthis humour!

Discussion in 'Cranchiidae' started by Phil, Apr 12, 2003.

  1. Phil

    Phil Colossal Squid Supporter Registered

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    Don't ask me to explain this. I just found it and it made me laugh!

    http://www.squid.poormojo.org/cgi-bin/gennie.pl?Squid

    Our very own Dr Steve has a starring mention.



    Phil

    PS Before you mention it, I come from Britain. That's why I spelt 'humor' wrongly. We are traditionalists, you know.
     
  2. tomossan

    tomossan Blue Ring Registered

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    LOL :lol:

    poor GS.....
     
  3. Clem

    Clem Architeuthis Supporter Registered

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    I sent GS a note last week, asking him if he'd previously gone by the name "Midgard Serpent." No response. He's probably self-medicating with White Teuthids (4oz. aquavit, 4oz. Lysol, strained through crushed ice with an Orange Roughy garnish).

    :glass:

    Clem
     
  4. Tintenfisch

    Tintenfisch Architeuthis Staff Member Moderator

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    :roflmao:

    Oh my... too bad they based to much of it on that totally inaccurate infographic though... we tried to get them to fix that but apparently the damage has been done. :?
     
  5. tomossan

    tomossan Blue Ring Registered

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    you mean its not twice the size as a sperm whale?!?!

    i am shocked and disheartened.

    When will the fat cats at BBC learn that scientific accuracy is far more important than ratings.

    this is a day of shame for Britain :oops:

    only joking, but the graphic was cool; i did however think they reduced the GS's size and posture on purpose to make the Meso look more menacing.

    Take care, :spongebo:
     
  6. Clem

    Clem Architeuthis Supporter Registered

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    It's comforting to see that the double-decker bus remains one of Britain's standard unit of measure. If they were to be phased out, popular science would suffer a grievous loss.

    :cry:

    Clem
     
  7. tomossan

    tomossan Blue Ring Registered

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    dont even think about that clem.

    its not worth upsetting yourself, and us over something that WILL NEVER HAPPEN!

    and if it does, i think :meso: will have something to say about it. Its not evryday u get measured up agianst a double decker bus =P
     
  8. Clem

    Clem Architeuthis Supporter Registered

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    Tomossan,

    You're right, of course. The double-decker bus is as much an eternal symbol of Britain as the Concorde.

    :roll:

    Clem
     
  9. GeoffC

    GeoffC Cuttlefish Registered

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    And elephants... If you ever read a kids science book in the 70's. All dinosaurs, whales, monsters mythical or otherwise were measured in bus-lengths and elephant weights (usually bull elephants, as I believe the SI unit is called) :grad:

    Hope that clarifies things?
     
  10. WhiteKiboko

    WhiteKiboko Colossal Squid Supporter Registered

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    what about cows? how many times have i heard about something (or things - usually pirahnas) being able to eat a cow in X mins.
     
  11. Clem

    Clem Architeuthis Supporter Registered

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    The poor cows. Perhaps that's the amazonian equivalent of "cow-tipping."

    "Hey, I'm buzzed. Let's go push a yanqui cow in the river."
    "10 blow-darts says it'll be eaten to the bone in two minutes."
    "You're out of your mind. One minute, and I'll raise you two doses of anaconda."
    "You're on. Waitaminnit. You don't have any anaconda."
    "I will. Look behind you."
    "Dang, that's a big one. How big would you guess that is?"
    "Ohhh, lessee, maybe one, two double-decker buses, plus a bull elephant."
    "What's an elephant?"
    "What's a double-decker bus?"

    (silence.)

    "I'm hungry."
     
  12. GeoffC

    GeoffC Cuttlefish Registered

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    :lol:

    But you seem to be mixing your units, Length is measured in Busses, Weight in Elephants. However I don't know what half units or multiples are called...

    For further information I refer the honourable gentlemen to the same site that started this thread:

    http://www.poormojo.org/cgi-bin/gennie.pl?Squid+127

    "Notes From The Giant Squid: On the James Madison System of Weights and Measures (An Almanac Item)"
     
  13. Clem

    Clem Architeuthis Supporter Registered

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    My units are distinct and un-mixed, thank you. It's the buzzing, prankish Yanomanis who conflated length and weight. I'm sure they'd appreciate the correction.

    "Who was that guy?"
    "Some yanqui. Apparently, we conflated different standards of measure."
    "Is that like mixing metaphors?"
    "What's a metaphor?"

    (silence)

    "You think he could outfight an adolescent Mesonychoteuthis?"
    "No, but fifteen Capybara pelts says he doesn't last one minute in the candiru pool."
    "You're on."

    :goofysca:

    Clem
     
  14. Phil

    Phil Colossal Squid Supporter Registered

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    Thanks for that link Geoff. It was very funny, whatever reality it comes from.

    I hope Tani reads it!

    Geoff, I totally agree with you about the use of a bull elephant as a 'norm' in kids science books of the seventies. It became a sort of 'British Gold Pachystandard' of its time. We used to be set complex maths problems at school such as:

    'If an average sized Cockney Pearly King and Queen expand at a rate of one Imperial inch per week after eating X amounts of jellied eels, how many Pearly Kings and Queens could one place in a red double decker bus after Y weeks. And how many bowler hats could one fill up the rest of the space with? Please also calculate the drag co-efficient on the fully laiden bus and time taken to drive from Big Ben to Buckingham Palace'.

    Capital, old chap.

    Oh sorry, here's a squid! :meso:
     
  15. Clem

    Clem Architeuthis Supporter Registered

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    Phil,

    African or European jellied eels?

    Clem
     
  16. WhiteKiboko

    WhiteKiboko Colossal Squid Supporter Registered

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    wouldnt a hippo be about a half an elephant?
     
  17. GeoffC

    GeoffC Cuttlefish Registered

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    Indeed!! What ho, is this the Clapham omnibus? Threpenny one to Hamersmith please.

    European jellied eels are, I believe, a migratory species, whereas African jellied eels are prone to hide among the mangroves. Therefore any jellied eels consumed north o' the river are likely to be European. But if you tawkin about your whelks, cockles or winkles... :snail:

    Tata for now.
     
  18. GeoffC

    GeoffC Cuttlefish Registered

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    No, that would be an Elep :jester:

    But then what are hippo's divided into?? And how would you weigh these things anyway? Hmmm, this calls for the BIG set of scales.
     
  19. Clem

    Clem Architeuthis Supporter Registered

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    Quite right.

    Unless, the African eels hitched a ride in the bilge tanks of a steam-vessel, or were introduced deliberately by a Sikh submariner intent on punishing the Sceptered Isle.

    :snorkel:

    Clem
     
  20. Phil

    Phil Colossal Squid Supporter Registered

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    Ah, Clem, surely the humble Nautilus follows a miandering non-migratory pattern. I recall no Rura-Penthe in the English Channel.


    (I'm getting a bit lost now).
     

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