Hi tonmoers! I have this essay due on monday for my 7th grade class and I was wondering if anybody had anything to add or see any mistakes. I hope you like it! (Sorry if it sucks lol!) Itch Here is an itch on the huge, putrid; hairy back of society that most probably haven’t considered, but never the less it needs to be. Imagine this… Your sitting at home one day doing some spring cleaning, when all of the sudden a huge pointed metal rod is shoved through your door right smack dab in the middle of your chest. I know what you’re thinking…. Ouch! I know but that’s not even half of it. Next you grab the rod with your arms and desperately trying to pull yourself free while thinking “OH SMOKES I’M SCREWED!!!” You huff and puff and even soil yourself you’re so scared. Right about now you’re probably wondering… How could it get any worse? Well, I’ll tell you. Then the rod suddenly lurches backwards with immense force (I can tell you this much, It probably feels about 20 times as painful as having your tooth pulled without drugs). You flail your arms desperately trying to grab anything in sight, you manage to grab onto the wall but your being pulled so hard it rips your hand right out of your socket. I bet that stings like heck! And as if you weren’t in enough pain as it is, a huge hand descend on you and rips you of the pole and places you roughly in small net sack made with really itchy, abrasive fibers; with about 6 other people. It’s really, really cramped. The next thing you know you’re on a strange dry alien world with no air. You sputter and cough up some blood. “Uuuunghh….” You moan in a dry parched raspy voice. Then comes the sudden realization that you can’t breath, you gasp for breath but no oxygen comes to your lungs, instead dry, parched, hot, sand fills them. Then you lie there writhing in pain among the other gasping blood encrusted people. And the last thought to go through your head is… “Oh sweet mother earth I wish I had some water.” Disturbing isn’t? Yes that’s exactly what intelligent cephalopods like octopi cuttles all to often have to endure because of mankinds twisted greed for octopus rings and dried cuttlefish and squid snacks. If you still can’t see after that quite graphic narrative of the hunting of octopus that eating intelligent cephalopods is immoral and depraved maybe this will change your mind. Jacque-Yves Cousteau was the greatest underwater explorer of all time and through twenty years of cephalopod research he had come to trust our clever, soft; many armed friends. His experiences taught him that; cephalopods were far from the nightmarish creatures of legends denounced by Victor Hugo and many other writers. In fact they are just the opposite! These fascinating creatures are shy, playful, and highly intelligent-and if anything, mans second best aquatic friend (dolphins are first). And as Cousteau puts it in his book Octopus and Squid the soft Intelligence, The graceful ballerinas of the sea… Or something to that affect. I mean COME ON PEOPLE they can open JARS and BEFRIEND PEOPLE, what more do you want? So if you won’t take it from me take it from Jacque, CEPHOLOPODS ARE SMART! Now if that didn’t change your mind I only have two things to say to you. You are a fat monster and… May god have mercy upon your lost and evil soul. To the rest of you so long! And it is as I always say… Pity the cephalopod eating abomination, for he is lost in this world, and cursed to forever roam it with the burden of a tainted, evil, and corrupt soul.